Wednesday, July 29, 2009


Sailor here.

My neck hurts. My back hurts. I think even my teeth hurt. I told Mom how much I hurt yesterday and she called Dr. Karen. She drove off. She came back and shoved things down my throat. I didn’t like this because I couldn’t lift my head. But then I began to feel better. After I felt drunk.

Mom wants to know how I hurt myself, but I’m not telling. If I do, someone will probably get in trouble. And his name might be Bilgewater.

It was hard to sleep because I was afraid to lie down. It hurt to lie down in most of my favorite positions, so I stood a lot last night. Mom talked to me a lot in the dark, but I was too drunk to notice. The only place I slept was on my dog bed with my head hanging over my front feet.

This morning, Mom got up looking awful. She says when I have a bad night, she has a bad night. I must have had an awful night. She took me to Dr. Karen and I hung out with whining dogs. Dr. Karen was able to move my head all around, and I was afraid it would hurt, but it didn’t hurt too much. Then she took pictures of my bones. Everyone petted me. But nobody gave me cookies.

Then Mom took me to JD who had cookies hidden in a box. JD said I was beautiful and then did all sorts of things to my back and shoulders and neck. And toes. Mom says JD stuck needles all over me, too, but I didn’t notice. I was busy trying to figure out how to get to those cookies.

Finally, JD gave me cookies and Mom took me home.

I am tired. Mom gives me medicine to keep me comfortable, and it keeps me drunk. I am feeling better but my neck still hurts. Jib is being nice to me and Mom is being extra nice to me. I can sleep now on the rug and don’t have to hang my head over anything. I can still walk and trot a little and pee and eat and drink water. Mom gives me medicine inside of cheese and she stayed home to be with me today.

Maybe being drunk isn’t so bad after all.

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