Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Jib Here - Spelled!!

Jib here.

Mom can't wait til I grow up. She was down on her knees yesterday, doing something Zoe says is all about her Prey Drive. She was asking Santa (or someone big up in the sky) if I would EVER be safe outside my crate.

Who says I am safe INSIDE my crate? Huh?

I think I'll slide the pan all the way out of my crate again and chew up the corner. Again.


Jibby here. Guess what? Mom spelled me. Spelled me from class. Agility class. My favorite class. And Mom spelled me. She says that means we aren’t going back.

“Not ever?” I asked.

“Not for a while,” Mom said. “You need a brain in your head and not in your feet,” she said.

“And other parts,” she added under her breath.

What does she mean? My brain is fine. It works. It works fast. It works fun. Mom says that last night it fell out of my nose.

But I was good last night. I didn’t yell. I didn’t scream. Mom reminded me to be quiet. She reminded me with Stinky Spray. Right in my mouth. Yuk. Double yuk. And it was really hard not to yell. Yelling is fun now. Yelling is loud. I love to sound loud. It makes me feel grown up. Yelling is loud now because we have a new place. It is indoors. Actually, it’s through several doors. It is echo-ey. It is crazy. It is very exciting. There are Tall Ring Gates. Very tall. There is a Walk-It and a Climb-It and a Teeter. And many Overs.

And there are DOGS! Dogs everywhere! Dogs jumping. Dogs climbing. Dogs walking. Dogs chasing dumbbells. I love dogs!

And there was a big black Rushing Terror. He growled and lunged at me. So I had to show him. Mom said I did the teenage equivalent (whatever that is) of thumbing my dewclaws at him when he turned around. I peed in my corner. To show him this was MY place. Not his.

Mom groaned. She grabbed paper towels. Mom said she loves Nature’s Miracle. That must be me. I am Nature’s Miracle. I am Mom’s Miracle, too.

But best of all, there were GIRLS! I love girls! Girls are my favorite! And there was a collie girl!! Across the room. Heeling with her Mom. A collie girl!

My Mom let go of my collar. “Climb it!” she said. She pointed to the Tall ClimbIt. I climbed it. I stopped at the bottom. I touched the TouchIt.

And Mom was right. Right then my brain fell out my nose.

"Girls," my brain said. "There are girls here. Right across the Tall Ring Gates."

I ran. I launched. I cleared the Tall Ring Gates with room to spare.

I said hello to the Collie Girl. “Hi, I’m Jib. Who are you? I’m Jib!”

"Camille," she said. "I am Camille. What are you DOING?"

Camille's Mom grabbed me.

I ducked. I ran. I said hello to the Golden Girl. “Can I smell you? Huh? I’m Jib. I’m Jib!”

I started to say hello to Black Little Girl. But Mom caught up with me. She dragged me away.

And she spelled some words. Some bad words. And me. She spelled me, too. She spelled me out the back door. She spelled me down the sidewalk. She spelled me away from all the girls.

I was spelled from agility. Mom says we will go back. But I have to be put in neutral first. So my brain will stay in my head. So my nose will stay away from girls. So I will be good and not bark and not run away and not tell everyone I am Jib.

Now, is this fair?

Jib, the life of the party, spelled J-I-B